I pretty much live by this idea of doing something before I feel ready so I am not hung up on the unrealistic perfection of something . Initially, sometime in March of 2020 I had no choice but to adapt to this mindset because things were coming at me from all angles. I was basically fighting for my life. My parent’s life. The lives of our employees. The weddings belonging to my clients. Our restaurant. And my horses. To name a few. It was rough. And I feel no shame in sharing that many days I did not want to get out of bed. Although I had and continue to have such gratitude for the blessings in my life I could not see beyond the losses.
Finally after two years of holding up the walls of the restaurant, I picked up with my husband and dog and went to Italy for 2 months (so many of you had opinions about that!), and I sat in my baggage. I knew the trauma and the loss that these two years shoved in my face or slapped across my head needed to be felt and acknowledged. And that is what I did; I acknowledged the betrayal, celebrated the loyalty, owned the myriad of emotions and began healing. This is a work in progress as am I, but it really broke open everything I held inside and allowed me to start processing and unpacking all the things and feelings. Again, this was rough. And still a process.
And in those moments, I learned to accept that this is exactly me -> I am now strong enough to go before I am ready. And now it’s my choice to start before I am ready because perfection is not my truth. Progress is.
So this how I roll, and now part of living in that very truth. 👈🏼😎 -> Peloton’s Ally Love, Emma Lovewell, Robin Arzon and a few more began kicking my ass last December and I’ve been on the bike or in a class (or both, plus riding my horses) every day since December 29th of 2021. I lost 34 pounds. I worked through the immensely layered and complex trauma I experienced, I owned my shit, found myself and as my pal JLO likes to say, I got right.
And this post doesn’t even scratch the surface in case you were wondering. But maybe someone right now in a low moment will read it and feel in their soul that this post is urging you to keep going. It sends you love. And tenacity. And faith. Because you’ll need it all to push through. If I learned anything since 2020 it is to just. keep. going.
I got you. I send you all the good energy my friend. ✨
Go. And then keep going -> Especially when you are not ready. 👈🏼
How about that for some deep thoughts? ✨✨✨
